Phag Farm is a five star resort for the weary gay animal. Originally a working farm, the property was bought by the Four Paws Hotel Group and turned into a luxury resort catering to a decidedly gay clientele. Phag Farm has become the jewel in the crown of the Four Paws empire especially since they operate ten miles away from a Gay Animal reeducation clinic. They have many guests who are technically runaways from clinic and they check animals in on a Don’t ask, Don’t tell policy. As one fey collie put it, “It’s the underground railroad of spas.”

Phag Farm also is a world class health center, with personal trainers, massage therapists, and every spa treatment known to the animal kingdom. It’s the first stop for rich older shitzus. Gossip is rife because as every Party Animal knows, it’s not over till the curvaceous cow sings.